Friday, September 10, 2010

Google Instant , Filter Coffee and Mumbai Trains

There’s so much buzz about “Google Instant”  , my friend Venkat Ballsubbu , Senior Executive with an MNC Consulting in India , decided to call up Google to find out.

Venkat: What’s this Google Instant ? Don’t you know we still like Filter Coffee!
Google: Sir , Google Instant is not an Instant Coffee , It’s our new search enhancement that shows results as you type.

Venkat: But why , you guys were fast enough.  Many times you boast saying - About 104,000,000 results (0.19 seconds) , while my slow internet connection took 9 minutes to show them.
Google: (Faster Searches)  Sir , Our key technical insight was that people type slowly, but read quickly, So Google Instant can save 2-5 seconds.

Venkat: 2-5 SECONDS , Big deal !  We in India waste hours in meetings , while taking minutes ; waste hours smoking ,having tea , travelling on potholed roads , watching TV serials like Rahul ka swayamwar . We still waste days observing Bandhs for no rhyme or reason ; waste years preparing for Common Wealth Games and some Bollywood actors have wasted lifetime learning acting – What you talk 2-5 seconds of savings.

Google: (Smarter Predictions) Sir , Also , even when you don’t know exactly what you’re looking for, predictions help guide your search.
Venkat:  WTF ! , Predictions , My foot ! Every time I type "How to" , you predict “How to get pregnant” , You think an Indian needs Google to teach him How to get or make pregnant? 

Google: Sir , The most obvious change is that you get to the right content much faster than before because you don’t have to even press “search.”
Venkat: You got it all wrong , I never mind ‘pressing’ . Come with me in Mumbai’s crowded local trains , you’ll start enjoying pressing . Your product will fail in India.

Google: Sir , By the way , It’s a FREE service.
Venkat: Oh thanks , You should have told earlier . We love anything and everything , if Free.

More about Google Instant http://google.com/instant

8 comments:

Aditya Nandode said...

Rofl!

Shiv said...

Good Post.

Gaurav said...

hahaha nice one

Aficionado said...

Good satire !!

Vikas P Goel said...

thanks gaurav , aditya , shivji n aficionado.

Anu said...

Hahaha. Hilarious. #nowfollowing on Twitter :)

BK Chowla, said...

Your posts are really crisp

lisa said...

Nice one