Sunday, July 15, 2012

Cocktail - a teetotaler's perspective!

I had to watch this movie Cocktail, not that I am Bebo’s fan or something, just because that’s what a teetotaler can do – watch Cocktail while saying "waiter, one fresh lime soda please, sweet-salted both" Now having spent 1000 bucks, here are my 2 cents on the movie.

Characters : Veronica: Deepika , Meera: Diana & Gautam: Saif Uncle.

Story (read slowly): Veronica and Meera are friends. Gautam is Veronica’s friend. But Meera is not friends with Gautam. Gautam and Meera start liking each other. Now Veronica is not friends with Meera. Meera does not want to be friends with Gautam now. But Veronica is still friends with Gautam.  Gautam wants to again befriend Meera……. OK.OK. This is what an average dude and dudette on facebook call "It's Complicated, but Homi chose to call it - Cocktail.

I couldn’t sleep whole night after watching this movie.  It’s a very good script but in wrong hands and needed some editing. Wish the movies was made by our revered Sooraj Barjatya Sir, so that it reflected some Indian values. 

I am sure Sooraj sir would have changed a few things –

- How can a leading lady say “I’m a rich bitch”, “We’ll make an awesome threesome” , “You screwed me” and above all “I want to pee” . Man! when was the last time you ever heard a leading lady like Madhubala Ji say “I want to pee”. In movies, heroines don’t ever pee, forget saying that.

- Veronica & Gautam kissing, sleeping with each other, still ok. But, how the hell can they use same tooth brush. Ridiculous. Other bigger question is, if they had namak in their toothpaste!

- Now this song: Chadhi mujhe yaari teri aisi, jaise daaru desi. You mean country liquor? Indian Made Country Liquor!  We are the country of Prems & Sumans. Let’s not malign words like yaari comparing them to Daaru Desi. Sooraj ji would have edited this to - Chadhi mujhe yaari teri aisi, jaise chhaas safed si.

- The Ending - Man! Meera is still married to Kunal , so what if he didn’t accept her. Meera had to go back to Kunal.  Even if they had to make  Meera & Gautam a couple, how can they leave Veronica still single – Salman could have entered in the last frame to embrace Veronica.

- Last, name would have been "Mocktail – Zero percent alcohol

Let’s pray and wish that they don’t ever make Cocktail – 2, and if at all they make, Sooraj Ji is consulted on this. Cheers.