Oh my God, I am speechless!

Whenever I see these award functions, be it one of those 192 Bollywood awards an year or the one and only 'The Oscars', I dream of giving an acceptance speech.

Other way to express gratitude publicly is through these reality shows like KBC. Problem is that since childhood, I never faced any financial hardship. Also, none of my parents beat me so that I can paint a sorry picture.  Sometimes they gave me more than they could afford or I deserved, so nothing there in my life which makes me eligible to appear in a reality show. 

Then I thought why to subject myself to this cruel, man eat man world of cinema or reality TV when there is our own twitter. 

Now that I have 'arrived' on twitter, I must give an acceptance speech.

Here you go.

"Oh my God, Oh my God, I am speechless, this is incredible. I can’t believe that some 1200 of you, whom I haven't paid a single rupee, are following me. This is awesome. 

It’s an unbelievable act of God that you guys are following me. Some of you even have bigger car than me, which you keep flaunting every now and then, still follow me. That’s self less.

To all those pretty ladies, who keep ranting about their useless hubbies, in-disciplined kids but lovely dogs, thanks for following me. 

All those twitter biggies, with tens of thousands of followers, who are more particular about choosing the people they follow than their kids’ primary schools; I am indebted to you for life for following me.

Those wonderful wren n martin fan-club guys, known as Grammar-Nazis here, you are doing an awesome job. So what if a guy takes an hour to produce that deadly piece of witty pun, it’s your duty to tell in a split second that it should be it’s not its. Your (sorry) You’re awesome.

I must applaud the ladies and gentlemen, who always order food not for its taste but for it’s tweetability and instagrammableness. Wow. Your broccoli looks better than my coriander.

Special thanks to all those pun-machines, even if they are helping their kid to cross the road, then also they ensure that they tweet the joke at the speed of Usain Bolt to impress me and some 2345 other unknown blokes. Hope their kid has crossed the road safely.

I must mention here all those “avid readers” who drive all the way to crossword book stores, click pictures of books, tweet them. So what if they don’t buy or read. 

A special mention to those, who are awake till wee hours, just to participate in hash-tags because their twitter idols are also doing so. Kids' bed-time stories can happen later.

There's also a breed who live-tweet every TV event, be it a cricket match or an award show. They do this in spite of knowing that TV reach is far more than twitter. Take a bow.

How can I forget all those weather-broadcasters and flight information disseminatiors, it's because of you that people like me know that Pune's weather is awesome and flight to Bangalore is delayed by 30 minutes. What a service!

I know I am forgetting some tribes here, but as I said, Oh my God, Oh my God, I am speechless”

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Leaders and their twitter followers!

Recently, I came across this interesting phenomenon on twitter; People were fighting on twitter, using twitter and because of twitter–truly democratic na. I was not following the fighters but did check their timelines in academic interest. Among other things, they were also fighting over “Look, I got more followers than you” or as they call in Delhi “Janta hai mera baap kaun hai”.

In other related news, I recently earned 1000 followers. For a moment, I thought I should change my profile on Linked In to something like “That Bald guy on Twitter who has 1000+ followers”, then I thought distributing 1000 laddus in my society should be good enough to begin with. By the time, this post hit the blogger servers I had reached 1016 followers. The closest I came to being Sachin was when I was stuck on 999 followers, now I know how HE would have felt.

I also know of people who welcome their every single follower saying “Hey @dude, nice to have you here, look forward to interact” , yet to find out if they are equally nice in real life.

My sources tell me, that at a recent book launch, @AnAunty (handle changed to avoid twitter fight) introduced herself as “Hey, I am @AnAunty , got 4768 followers. Oh wait, it’s 4771 actually” . When people still refused to recognize her, she had to finally say “Hey, even @DakuRaja follows me, who has got 36745 followers and also featured on the cover of Outlook Magazine” . Thanks to Vinod Mehta and his two subscription requests email a day, some people had read Outlook and @AnAunty got her identity.

No wonder, post that event, the organizer said “Abe ye 4000 follower wali aunty apna mobile bhool gayi hai, jaldi de ke aa”.

We also login to apps which tell us “who unfollowed” and their names and DPs are imprinted on our minds forever and they shall be never forgiven for their ghastly acts. Some are so obsessed to regain them that they also mention the “important unfollower” in their tweets to make them feel guilty. Some naïve also ask “Hey, seems you pressed unfollow instead of RT :) ” .

Importance of “number of followers” doesn’t end here, we respond on twitter only if the guy has more follower than us or has a pretty DP. These days, you can still have some respect for not owning Honda City in Delhi but having 1000 twitter followers is a must.

Why not, having a “follower” on twitter is the closest some of us get to “being a leader”.

PS: Let’s not lose heart if you don’t have 1000 of them yet, just quit twitter.

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Unfollowing on Friday!

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Else I'll go on fast

Seeing the recent trend that "threat to fast" or "going on fast" really works, my friend VenCut BallSubbu wrote to his CEO .

........................................................

June 1, 2011

Dear Chief Executive Officer

It’s been a long time since I am working with our (y)our organization in spite of that awful office coffee which I have to drink 3-4 times a day. I spend almost 12 hours a day here, daily, work late evenings - all alone. In spite of working so hard, I feel that I haven’t got my due.

For the last 5 years I am working as Senior Manager and haven’t got promoted while many of my colleagues are AVP. My salary also is lesser than many of my batch mates who are working even in smaller companies. The company car I am provided with is Hyundai i10 while my batch mates are flaunting their Honda Citys. If I don’t hear from you (in writing) I’ll Fast unto Death in the Big Video Conference Room.

Regards

VenCut BallSubbu

Senior Manager , Quality Control.

Quick came the reply

....................................................

June 3, 2011

Dear Vencut

Thanks for writing in, after getting your email, I came to know that we have a department called Quality Control - you work there, right?

I really appreciate the fact that you are working with us for 9 years while many of our Top Performers have left us in less than 2 years to work for better companies. I asked for your records from HR but am told that our employee records got destroyed in Mumbai Floods in 2005, any how who needs records of those yesteryears.

I also emailed your Boss Joe to find out about your performance but got an out of office reply “I am busy attending a quality paradigm shift offsite in Mauritius so won’t be able to answer your mail, please contact Vencut in my absence”. As I couldn’t find about your performance, either from HR or from your Boss, I searched facebook and twitter to find more about you. Thank God, both these companies are not Mumbai based else they also wouldn’t have any records. 

To my surprise, I found that you bought iPad2 from the grey market after paying a hefty premium and still cribbing about your salary. I also noticed that you are connected with my secy on facebook and “liking” her comments and pics. Last week when you took a “sick” leave from office, you went to Water Kingdom with your friends – What kind of sickness is this which gets cured there.

I checked your Bio on twitter, where you say that “you are a VP with an awesome IT company”.- Gross lie it is. After viewing some of your batch mates’ facebook pages, I came to know that most of your projects during MBA were done by your batchmates while you were busy dating one of your seniors.

Still I would like to give your case a fair hearing and asking Head HR to form a committee to evaluate your records (that reminds me , please submit your marksheets and other credentials, in duplicate, as we don’t have any records ).


Regarding long working hours, I always wondered why our office AC bills were so high – I am asking Head-Facilities to see if some of those can be deducted from your salary. I absolutely agree with you that the office coffee sucks,even I bring my coffee from home, but drinking 3 cups of office coffee a day-daily for 9 years-really shows your character.

Also, as per the company policy, access to the Big Video Conference room is not allowed to officials below AVP grade so please look for some other place to go on fast.


Cheers

Your CEO

PS: please ‘unfriend’ my Secy immediately.

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What to say when you got nothing to say.

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Venusians on Twitter !

This post is a result of extensive research and study, my sample size was approximately 3 women and Two and a Half men, many of them not even on twitter.By the end of this post you would know how to differentiate a Male tweep ( usually from Mars, wandering on earth) from a Female tweep (also owns the earth,  from venus though)  or vice versa (Refer Disclaimer). This post doesn't cover Archana, Farah or Bieber for obvious reasons.

So let's start, how to identify a female tweep.

Display Profile: It’s a no-brainer, one with pretty DPs are usually women. Some time you’ll see only half face with pretty eyes, only eyes, side pose , ever smiling face, and also some frequently changing DPs. Please ensure you don't stare for long, in past many men are caught viewing womens' DP on full-screen mode.

Twitter Handle: Handles are bit confusing, say @adi may be Aditya, Aditi or AdIndia, so arriving at a conclusion on the basis of handle alone is not good enough. Let's say even for @jyoti and @laxmi don't assume they are women as it could be Jyotiraditya or Laxmipati Balaji. So don’t try judging by handles, if by any chance you see some explicit mention says @RitzHotChick, safely assume that it’s an Orkutiya in disguise.

Bio: Well, for female species, 140 characters are never enough to describe, still you can get some subtle hints from the Bios.

[“I am that 80s girl, literally”]  [“Part-time writer, full time mum”] [“Scorpion, Non believer, Shopaholic”]  [“ hubby’s handle is @vikaspgoel”]  [“Chatterbox , Tweet a lot, and an Arjun Rampal fan”]  [“Drama Queen”] 

Tweets: Last and the most are the tweets itself, some sample tweets you are unlikely to see from a male tweep are: 

“Son won an award today, so proud” - Dads are equally proud, but hardly tweet.

“Guy I had a crush in school is so fat now”. - Sour grapes

“Bad day, Little darling Jacky didn’t eat properly”  or simply “I love Jacky”– Though it’s sure that tweeter is a woman, but Jacky may be dog, boy friend , husband or driver.

“Off to Gym still craving for that chocolate cake” - usually tweeted by fittest of female species to create complex among other members of same species.

“Fed up with these orkutiyas, some one help please” - This is just a self-confidence building measure.
"There r ***** guys in d world" - Means nothing, but results in many mentions.
"No one wants to talk to me" - Actually a trap, guys start replying and she'll vanish or declare the guy a stalker.


Finally, stereotyping this species is almost suicidal, so it's always better to avoid generalizing and go by your own experience. 

Disclaimer:  None of the above tips are 100% fool proof, so author takes no responsibility if you err, by the way why do you want to find out if a tweep is a man or a woman on Twitter, focus on real life instead.

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Orkutiya - Verified by Orkut.

This summary is not available. Please click here to view the post.Tweet

New Nationalised Twitter

NewTwitter would be launched first in Tembhli - Maharashtra on pilot basis.

Now , The New Birdie

• 40 out of 140 characters would be for the reserved category.
• VIPs would be able to tweet up to 160 characters.
• Twitter would be available from 9-5 , Monday to Friday.
• Twitter Dry Day on Gandhi Jayanti , Republic and Independence Day.
• People with > 350 followers would have to pay wealth tax.
• User names have to be Unique IDs or Pan Numbers.
• All Mumbaites would have to end every tweet with #JaiMaharashtra
• Handles would be renewed every 5 years after mandatory police verification.

Now , The Nationalised FailWhale

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Why Kashmir doesn't get solved on my timeline ?

click on the image to view .

To view on TwitPic , click here http://twitpic.com/2u2pvh

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Uday Chopra , Suzuki GSK-R1000K6 and Twitter

As you know, Bobby, my friend works with Twitter and takes care of the verification process at Twitter, narrated to me how Uday Chopra got his account verified.

Uday :  Hi, Is this Twitter? I am Uday. I need to get my Twitter account verified. And listen, I am in a hurry,  have to leave for a shoot.

Bobby: Sir , Kindly give me your full name and Isn't shooting illegal in India?

Uday:  Bugger, firstly,to be precise, I am the Uday Chopra and am talking about film shooting. You haven’t watched DDLJ ....

Bobby: Ya, Ya now I remember, were you SRK’s friend who wore a cap....

Uday:  Bugger, that was Karan Johar, ....any ways what about “ Mujhse Dosti Karoge”?

Bobby: Sir please , I am not that type and I have a girl friend..

Uday : I AM TALKING ABOUT  THE MOVIE , ANY WAYS DID YOU WATCH DHOOM 2 ?

Bobby: Yes Sir , there were 3 Suzuki bikes 1000 cc GSK-R1000K6 , 600 cc GSX-R600K6 and GSR600K6 and all are my favourite , Hrithik was excellent , Abhishek was Ok but there was one bugger who shouldn’t be even allowed to drive a Luna . By the way, Were you director of the movie ...?

Uday: Forget it , Did you see Pyaar Impossible ?

Bobby: Yes sir, we got some free passes  , free popcorn and a corner couple seat . So went with my girl friend . There was Priyanka Chopra in it.......

Uday:  ( interrupts and sighs with relief ) There you are , and I was Priyanka Chopra’s ....

Bobby: (Interrupting ) you should have told earlier sir . Your account is verified now . Completes the details - Uday Chopra , Brother of Priyanka Chopra .... .Hangs the phone.

PS: I am a big fan of Uday Chopra , and I promise that I’ll watch his movie whenever he does his "ACTING" debut. 

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Twit India Movement

If this was year 1942 , and Twitter was invented , my timeline would have looked like this .

@rameshsrivats Enough of Britons in India , Angrezo Bharat Chhodo and I would call it Quit India Movement

@krishashok #QuitIndiaMovement #QIM RT @rameshsrivats Enough of Britons in India , and I would call it Quit India Movement

@jhunjhunwala I HAVE ARRIVED AND I CONDEMN ALL THE BRITONS FOR OCCUPYING OUR TERRITORY.

@rameshsrivats “I Quit Manned Motive” #ANAGRAM #QuitIndiaMovement

@spymaami 11 wants to know what is this Quit India movement , Are the schools open , Whatever.

@jhunjhunwala TELL BRITONS THAT HIS HIGHNESS IS SAYING , THEY CAN TAKE RAVINDRA JADEJA WITH THEM

@madversity US became "independent" in 1776 but had slavery for 100 years after, and civil rights came only in the 1960s. Why such hue n cry now @futurescape

@surekhapillai Why there are so many #Orkutias on Quit India Movement , I’m tempted to list and publish them @ashumittal #QIM

@sunainak #YouMamaSoFat that She’ll get stuck in the door while quitting India . #LameAttempt #YouKnow

@ashwinsanghi Top 10 movies on Quit India Movement around the world http://bit.ly/a4fRTY .

@chetan_bhagat To the girl who redefined cuteness for generations to come, happy b'day @geneliad , btw I am not against QIM

@kjohar25 Ekta and I have decided to stick to the alphabet K and would like to call it Kwit India Movement !

@jhunjhunwala It's time for the FridayBrunch! 3....2....1...OUT

PS: Though i have used genuine twitter handles , but these are my thoughts and i haven't taken any permissions.

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Calvin Klein's new range :Verified by Twitter

Verified badge by Twitter is the most sought after thing on Twitter (only winning a Nobel prize would come close).

I also heard that Twitter is planning to start a designer label in collaboration with Clavin Klein to let you flaunt your “verified” status to your offline social gatherings ( read office parties , cousin’s wedding and funerals ). Yes , this would include CK’s very popular range of innerwear also.

But verification is not easy !

Recently , I applied for the “Verified by Twitter” and this is what I went through .

Bobby from Twitter ( B) : Sir , we received your application , would you mind if we run you through a small identification process and also verify your credit card details.

Me : Why credit card ? Isn’t this verification free?

Bobby : Sir , seems you don’t have an Apple iTune account , Valid credit card is a pre-requisite and we follow the same process. By the way , I am a Steve Jobs fan.

Me : OfCourse , I have an iTune account , Go Ahead ( rubbing eyes receiving call at 3 Am ).

Bobby : Please press 1 and after the Beep press # , and keep following the instructions over voice mail . Hope your hands are clean as there were some cases of swine flu in India.

Me : O Yeah , rubbing my eyes , I start the drill .

(After spending 37 minutes, and when my blackberry screen displayed 123*10101976*3478#2306*1267#2098#1237*4466324798620001*148# , I heard a voice from the other side)

Bobby : Sir , thanks for the verification , It was little long but worth it.

Me : Screaming , “LITTLE LONG” , Its almost 1 hour and have developed a blackberry thumb because of that. You should have checked time , Its 3am in India.

Bobby : Sir , I know what time is in India , I am calling from a call centre in Kormangala , Bangalore . If you wish , I’ll disconnect and call you tomorrow , any how It’s you who applied , Twitter didn’t invite you.

Me : Ok , but the wait was really long.

Bobby : Sir , that was 37 minutes and 23 seconds not even 10% of the time you spend daily on Twitter.By the way , if you had iPhone4 , you wouldn’t be talking about this blackberry thumb.

Me : I don’t have an iPhone4 , heard that’s got “network” problem ?

Bobby : Sir , that was all hype , dropping a call or two shouldn’t matter. Everyone has forgotten the time when there was no cell phones . And you should be grateful that Steve has given free bumper case to all . Any ways , lets not digress and complete the verification.

Me : Screaming ! YOU DIGRESSED , What is this complete the verification? Isn’t it complete as yet.

Bobby : Sir , we have received your credentials and those are being googled to check your popularity. I have my doubts seeing your number of followers , any how ....

Me : Oh great , You don’t use Twitter search , I heard that’s very good?

Bobby : Sir , Twitter is over capacity . You haven’t heard of Fail Whale?

Me : OfCourse , I have experienced it many times. But why aren’t you working on it ? Don’t you understand how difficult it is when Twitter is over capacity?

Bobby :Sir , I see you are active on Twitter for last 6 months also . Don’t you have friends in real life to speak with ? Why keep blaming Twitter all the time . Any Way , Lets not digress as Its already 5 am and my shift is coming to an end.

Me : Ok , Even I have to go for my morning walk and then office. Why don’t you hurry up.

Bobby : Yes , seems you are on LinkedIn & Facebook also . How come you are all over the social networking circle , Don’t you have a full time day job ?

Me : Haven’t you heard that “Facebook is for friends who are now strangers , and Twitter is for strangers you want to befriend , and LinkedIn helps you to professionally connect ”. And yes , I have a full time job .. ....

Twitter : ( Voice Over Interrupts and says) “Whoops , Something went wrong , please try again........

And I , slam the phone and head for my morning walk with my BlackBerry.

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UnFollow Saturday

Well if you can have Follow Friday , why can’t I have UnFollow Saturday . Time is precious , so is my TimeLine . I understand that its rude to “UnFollow” any one esp , being an Indian where they say “Atithi Devo Bhava ~ Guest is God” .

Still , other than time , its also about space and with a 2” by 2” blackberry screen , I can’t afford to have too many Creets ( Crap Tweets) on my TimeLine. Just imagine , I am in a very important office meeting , get a comfort break for couple of minutes , decide to use it for having a look at my Twitter Timeline and all I get is “ tweets with links without even mentioning what they contain”. I scroll down to see , and the other ones are quotes . It affects my productivity as well for the balance part of my meeting.

So on weekends I do this drill called “UnFollow Saturday” , here are my standards what makes some qualify for this prestigious drill .

RT Jockeys : All they do is RT , RT this , that ever thing else . If you don’t have anything original to say , you don’t have a place in my timeline .Just follow people and enjoy .

Quote Maniacs: By now I remember all what Winston Churchill , Mahatma Gandhi , Lucy , Nancy and Tina have said , remember if I Google I’ll get all the damn quotes , subject wise , done neatly . Why should I follow you for someone else’s quotes.

Serial Twiller: I repeat , my time n the space on my blackberry screen is precious , so I don’t want to see you , you n only you when I scroll down . Have a break, try Kit Kat.

Chat on Twitter: I know you both get along very well , you want to know what did She have for Dinner , Whether the Red dress you bought together is fitting well or not – But do that on G Talk , Yahoo , BB Messenger etc . Why the hell I and other 117 people should know your conversation.

Threesome: I have to unfollow 2 of you if you just keep on ReTweeing each other , don’t you think it’s better to follow 1 of you and get goodness of 3.

If after reading this , you are inspired to UnFollow me or any one else , just let me know the reason so that I can add in the blog. Thanks

Disclaimer: List is not exhaustive and i may unfollow you for reasons other than this also.

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Brick-bats n Bouquets via Twitter!

Warning : I may insult you while i write this , so think twice before going ahead . Also , just because you're featured here doesn't make you great - try earning it !

I follow around 100 odd people , and have chosen you all for a particular reason , prime purpose of remains entertainment while i am attending meetings .

What irritates me

Don't say just for the sake of saying , some times its better to post a blank tweet .

" I'm hungry" " have nothing interesting to say" - Go eat then , don't tweet

Its Twitter , not a chat room

"When r u reaching gurgaon" >"not possible today">"lets catch up at Noida">"8 o clock" - Why TF bother me and 100 others , go on yahoo chat , BB messenger or G Talk

Dear Mom , I ................

"Just had a 'light' lunch of fried bhindi, stuffed baingan, kofta & chana + missi roti" "- You really think , ur 450 followers want to know this unless you are SRK or Justin F*******

I don't have money for classified ads , and my hostel doesn't have a notice board

"Want a WiFi modem for rent/borrow. x_X Anyone interested" - Even if you get your modem from 1 , you have annoyed other 999 without any fault of theirs.

Hash Tag Jockeys

"#Steve #Jobs #apple #america #funny #ipad" - WTF

I like them , Be like them

@jhunjhunwala for everything esp being modest , jahanpanah tussi great ho

@spymaami don't ask me why i like her , u fu*****

@ashwinsanghi being a wordsmith , must be cousin of william wordsworth

@amancool5 for your serious tweets n even serious looks ( once a senior , always a senior)

@sunainak "I love hate storys", u make effort or its natural ?

@krishashok did you invent #hashtag?

@rameshsrivats Hats off !

Enough of praise , now get back tweeting please , i have a meeting to attend !

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Peter , Repeater and ReTweeter!

Santa planned name of his boy - Peter – But had twins so named them Peter n Repeater . Thank God he was not on twitter , else would have Tweeter and Retweeter .
Actually , ReTweeter is the fastest growing community in this world , and there are many types of ReTweeters .

My timeline has some of the most interesting types of ReTweeters* , Let me start calling names!

Only RTers: Retweet the moment it hit types : With eyes glued on their timelines , they simply RT anything and every thing.
Worship RTers: These are the ones who actually worship many of them they follow , so if their GOD has tweeted , has to be Retweeted , irrespective of the content! Sometimes if Sachin goes to the Loo and say’s going to the loo – they RT.
Add a bit RTers: Read the tweet , if interesting , start thinking what can be added , then add a word or two and there you go !
WTF RTers: I love this phrase and can be added to most of the tweet , so they RT and just add prefix WTF!
LOL RTers: Other phrase which can be prefixed to dumb or hilarious tweets , so prefix and hit RT.
Thanks RTers: if you have been RTed , you should thank. So this kind RT listing all the handles who have RTed them . Some of them actually post 7-8 tweets in asecond as they have to thak many. They add exclaimations ranging from Thanks to Luv , Hugs n Kisses for RT . Remember Bryan Adams : Just RTed to say …… I thank you!
Obligated RTers: Well if last time he / she RTed ur tweet , its your obligation to RT –so RT to return the favor.
Gang RTers: Well if the Tweet is from a member of the gang , it has to ReTweeted
Never RTers: SRK when would you start RTing

Btw , what ever category you are in , please feel free to RT me , I never mind.

*: List is not exhaustive , so feel free to challenge , add , comment .
@vikaspgoel

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Why the hell I tweet?

Am about to reach my 1000th tweet , that means must have wasted around 1,40,000 character's of twitter space- may be would have added to some carbon foot print also . No worries , shall plant some trees (virtually on twitter).

I think twitter is gross waste of time , and is seriously affecting my career , personal and professional life - must tell that was about to fall off the treadmill running at a speed of 10km/hr because tried tweeting while running .

Well that's not the only pitfall of being on twitter as there is always a hospital near by to fix you up , should you fall of the treadmill . Real issue is curiosity ? There is nothing more intriguing in life than twitter .

Even after having tweeted 1000 tweets and following 100 people , some questions remain un answered :

- How to resist temptation of tweeting amidst an important meeting , driving , jogging or ****ing etc etc?

- Why some tweets carry only #hashtags and twitter handles and nothing else?

- WTF does FTW means ?

- @jhunjhunwala is so rude still people standup when he "arrives"?

- What the hell is "you follow me , i'll follow you" concept?

- How come @rameshsrivats is so funny yet many other suck?

- Who is @spymaami?

- Once on twitter , how to think beyond 140 characters in daily life?

- How come @sidin 's mediocre tweet is retweeted by 100 people and no one looks at most wittiest of my tweets?

- What's the logic of @toptweets picking tweets , how come my tweet has never been re tweeted?

- Why do some people just keep retweeting left right n centre?

- How come two genuine people @amancool5 and @ashwinsanghi and some 50 other still following me and the rest of the ******** are going crazy about Bieber , Jieber or what ever that ******** is ?

- finally , after all this , WHY THE HELL I @vikaspgoel TWEET?

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Twitter is not easy , So is Life!

Though I created my twitter account more than a year back but got active on twitter only recently ( @vikaspgoel ). The whole idea of being able to say some thing meaningful in < 140 characters , excites me . Now after more than 500 tweets , have learnt that Twitter is not easy , so is life !

Life also doesn't give you long to prove your self , here its 140 characters that's it.

You work hard to get followers on twitter , so in life ! - After 500 tweets , all i have is a set of 36 followers

You think you are at wittiest best , and never get quoted ( Read RT )

You say smart things in forums / meetings , still don't get mentioned.

You ask questions to leaders , managers but don't get answers.

You get jealous of peers for having more than you inspite of your calibre - how come his followers are more than yours

People take credit of others' work - Read RT without mention

You quietly admire people still don't acknowledge - checking timelines but yet not follow

You admire people just because others' admire - tend to follow who got more follwers

You are serious and people ridicule you - replying with a smiley

You never know actually how many like you - may be 3600 followers check my timeline but not follow me :)

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